If i tell you what this is about, chances are you won't read...

If you ever catch a random episode of Seinfeld I can almost guarantee that you’re not going to love it from the on-set. The picture quality was, for lack of an appropriate technical word, bad. I’m no expert when it comes to the lenses but the whole time I was forced to watch it in the beginning I kept thinking “Gosh, they should really get that camera replaced!” But in retrospect I think it might not have been completely the camera’s fault. It seemed the whole thing seemed a bit 'dull' because they kept focusing on the 'dull'. It seems everything on the sets was either gray or blue-gray or brown or black. Not the riot of color that you’d see on those early Friends episodes that shared some of its later production years.

Then there are the characters…They’re not what you call ‘lovable’ (like the Friends lot) and are a bit too much in your face except maybe for Jerry and this does not change the longer you watch it but it grows on you. And I bet most people can’t get past the fact that there aren’t any hotties on the show unlike say… the cast of ‘Friends’! I mean these people look like the type who could put you to sleep and their fashion sense operates backwards when compared to that of Friends. And I can honestly say I don’t think the show ever got to the point where the characters bonded emotionally. And again this is where the ‘Friends’ tips the scales.

But you have to let your superficial self go and ask yourself is this what matters when you’re watching a comedy?

On the flipside…

For everything that’s wrong with Seinfeld I figure there’s two things right. Like the script is so funny and the delivery of the lines by the characters is brilliant. Each character has their mannerisms and keeps so loyally to it in every scene and once you’ve seen an entire season of episodes you’ll appreciate this constancy.

The interesting thing about this show is that it’s about 'nothing' as the characters so liberally state and yet it is about 'everything'. It’s hilarious how the characters are so paranoid and blow out of proportion the smallest things in life. It’s kinda like what I always want to do in a similar moment but put off because it’s too confrontational. Here’s one such scene that I wish I could re-enact:


ELAINE: Tell me if you think this is strange: There's this guy who lives in my building, who I was introduced to a couple of years ago by a friend. He's a teacher, or something. Anyway, after we met, whenever we'd run into each other on the street, or in the lobby, or whatever, we would stop and we would chat a little... Nothing much. Little pleasantries. He was a nice guy, he's got a family... Then after a while, I noticed there was no more stopping. Just saying hello and continuing on our way. And then the verbal hellos stopped, and we just went into these little sort of nods of recognition. So, fine. I figure, that's where this relationship is finally gonna settle: Polite nodding. Then one day, he doesn't nod. Like I don't exist?! He went from nods to nothing.

GEORGE: (imitating Tony Bennett) "You know, I'd go from nods to nothing...”

ELAINE: And now, there's this intense animosity whenever we pass. I mean, it's like we really hate each other. It's based on nothing.

JERRY: A relationship is an organism. You created this thing and then you starved it so it turned against you. Same thing happened to The Blob.

GEORGE: I think you absolutely have to say something to this guy. Confront him.

ELAINE: Really?

GEORGE: Yes.

ELAINE: You would do that?

GEORGE: If I was a different person.

Later on in the episode….

ELAINE: So, I had what you might call a little encounter this morning.

JERRY: Really? That guy who stopped saying hello?

ELAINE: Yep.

JERRY: You talked to him?

ELAINE: Yep. I spotted him getting his mail. And at first, I was just going to walk on by, but then I thought "no, no, no, no. Do not be afraid of this man."

JERRY: Right.

ELAINE: So, I walked up behind him and I tapped him on the shoulder. And I said, "Hi, remember me?" And he furrows his brow as if he's really trying to figure it out. So I said to him, I said, "You little phony. You know exactly who I am."

JERRY: "You little phony"?

ELAINE: I did. I most certainly did. And he said, he goes, "Oh, yeah. You're Jeanette's friend. We did meet once." And I said, "Well, how do you go from that to totally ignoring a person when they walk by?"

JERRY: Amazing.

ELAINE: And he says, he says, "Look, I just didn't want to say hello anymore, alright?" And I said, "Fine. Fine I didn't want to say hello anymore either, but I wanted you to know that I'm aware of it."

JERRY: You are the Queen of Confrontation. You're my new hero.

End scene

Now that’s… bravery for you!

And the show addresses a lot of everyday silly stuff like that. Like Jerry’s mother loving him so much that she keeps asking rhetorically about Jerry “How could anyone not like him?” And then there was this parking lot episode which was so hilarious. You gotta see it to know that this is what you never want to happen to you if you parked in a parking lot and forgot where you parked!

Oh and have you heard of this term 'Re-gifter or Re-gifting'? If you haven’t you can probably take a guess and figure it’s 'A person who gives things they received from others as gifts. They take what was given to them and send it to someone else out of laziness and spite.'

Well apparently the term originated from Seinfeld. In the episode "The Label-Maker” Elaine calls Dr.Tim Whatley a 'regifter' after he gives Jerry a label-maker that was originally given to Whatley By Elaine.

Now try and tell yourself that the idea never crossed your mind especially when it was something you hadn’t and wouldn’t use at all? I figure there are some of us out there who think about it and think “Nah” and some of us who have actually done it. (Hushed silence) I don’t think there’s a category of us who hasn’t thought about it. Ok… well unless you never had to give someone else a gift and had nothing you could potentially 're-gift'.

I also especially loved the little monologue bits that Jerry did at The Comedy Club. There’s so many I can’t list them even though I really really want to, but trust me everyone of them is so funny.

JERRY: Every time somebody recommends a doctor, he's always the best. "Oh, is he good?" "Oh, he's the best. This guy's the best." They can't all be the best. There can't be this many bests. Someone's graduating at the bottom of these classes, where are these doctors? Is somewhere, someone saying to their friend, "You should see my doctor, he's the worst. Oh yeah, he's the worst, he's the absolute worst there is. Whatever you've got, it'll be worse after you see him. He's just, he's a butcher. The man's a butcher."? And then there's always that, "Make sure that you tell him that, you know, you know me." Why? What's the difference? He's a doctor. What is it, "Oh, you know Bob! Okay, I'll give you the real medicine. Everybody else, I'm giving Tic-Tacs."

I realize this is barely eclectic and certainly not stormy content but hey... i needed to post this to prevent the eclectic storm of having this stuff unwritten and circling about in my head forever.